Thursday, March 26, 2009

It's All In Your Mind

I came across an interesting quiz on the Times website yesterday. It was designed by a scientist to uncover how male or female your brain is, as there is not always a correlation between brain sex and body sex. It doesn't mean you're gay, just that some people are wired in a more male or female way of thinking and approaching things.

The scale ran from 1 for very male to 20 for very female. I completed the test and came out at 8, so much more male than female as far as my brain goes. But that's hardly a surprise. I never had any problems reading maps to the extent that I can navigate me and Mr Zeus using maps in Greek, and for me GPS takes all the fun out of travelling.

I used to love taking apart my toys to see what was inside. I have a guerilla shopping technique - in and out in as little time as is possible. I've never been for a manicure or a facial and never felt the need to. I'm terrible at making small talk and prefer to get to the point.

My future sister in law was showing me how she has started to re-dye her hair in stages so it will be the exact colour she wants in time for our wedding in July. It dawned on me that many of the women around me are already pondering their look for the wedding, whereas my plan was to wash and go and hope for a good hair day. Some women I know get into a total frenzy when I say I don't know yet what I'm doing for hair and makeup. Don't get me wrong, everyone wants to look nice, but I don't want to be obsessed with how perfect everything must be. I already have zero control over when my resident spots break into rebellion.

My ultra skanky plan was to walk into the MAC store on Ermou with a pic of a desired makeup look on the morning of the wedding (I still can't think of it as that, more like a party) and say "I'd like to achieve this look, can you do me a demonstration?" and walk out with my makeup ready-done and maybe buy a product or two to cover up my evil motives. Would that really be so terrible?

For hair I really don't know. My hair is so thick and curly I don't think anyone will know what to do with it. Would it really be so heinous to bundle it up loosely with some flowers? I did my own hair for my godson's baptism and everyone asked me where I got it done.

I'm going to sit back and watch the fur fly around me. I'll probably lie here and there and say I've organised weekly oxygen facials by blind Tibetan monks in order to not appear to be a bad sport. I almost feel like I'm spoiling other people's fun when my answer to everything is "I don't know yet". The paperwork and legalities of the marriage and just getting a frickin' date are of more concern to me than the other details. Hopefully the ethnic wedding attire will be enough to distract guests from spots and bumps and lumps, oh my!


Matt said...

Go to MAC on Ermou and ask for Anna or Maro, both speak great English and both will turn you into whatever you want to be! Tell them Matt from Australia sent you, you may get a discount ;)

Yorkshiregurl said...

Hey, Just came across your blog and found it very interesting because I'm a British Indian married to a Greek and have lived in Greece for 5 and a half years. I can understand how you're feeling! Unfortunately where we were there weren't any other asian people so you're lucky to be in Athens at least you can go to the asian shops, no such thing around our neck of the woods!
Also, have a love for Bollywood... I just love Mr SRK! I keep on telling my other half they should show bollywood in Greek cinemas, the people would love it!

Scotzesa said...

I think you should go see Anna or Maro at Mac, as suggested by Matt from Australia, WAY WAY LONG before the wedding and have a play with the makeup. Tell them that you are getting married and try out the make up before the big day as on the day too late and everyone else will be having minor hysterics. If you can get them to come to your flat on the day of the wedding to do a "homer"" ie paid in cash in hand, that would be better.
your hair sounds lovely tied up in fresh flowers, it will be a long day will they wilt?

as for spots, don't leave it to chance if they really are a problem, get some face roll-on i cannot remember what its called will get back to you on that one if you are interested. otherwise for true acnes antibiotics do work but take 6 weeks min to clear things up.

oh and get a manicure the night before so it will be rock hard on the day. pedicure too if wearing sandals.

my bridesmaid brought a bottle of vodka to put in the orange juice, as we were getting ready [ in glasgow of course] and had made up a cassette of good music now it would be a ipod i guess. get some sisters or good friends who actually want to help you to look your best. i dressed up my girlfriend for her wedding in athens and she looked gorgoeus and i am no make up artist but was done with lots of lve.
No point in being too cool about it as really cool relaxed brides have had to put in a lot of leg work, word of warning if you are not assertive enough you will get walked over by greek female in laws who want to shine on the day. ok ok that was my experiance and likely won t be yrs i should get over it as it was a long long time ago.

too too long comment so if you read nothing else do enjoy

hugs scotzesa

bollybutton said...

Thanks for the comments! I will check out this Anna and Maro you speak of.

This wedding beast is starting to slip out of my control. Anyone who has been to a Greek wedding knows that the women come ready to outdo everyone, even the bride. Even guests get their hair done in a salon, manicures, new dresses etc.

I completely understand why my parents just registered their marriage and didn't bother with the rest. And no one believes me when I shout "Everyone! Calm the fug down!" Biggest day of your life and all that nonsense. The paperwork alone has put me off so badly I wish I could just call off all the showbizzy bits and keep it simple.

Maybe I should pull out all the stops. The Simple Do It Yourself Route is rapidly slipping from my fingers, maybe I should go ALL OUT!!!! LIKE THISS!!! HOW DO YOU LIKE ME NOW BITCHES! YOU WANTED BRIDEZILLA, YOU GOT HER!!!

Sesi said...

Alright, welcome to Greek families then! You had it coming!
A small how-to-avoid-wedding-madness inc:
1. Make sure you get real good friends with someone in the Greek family. A female. After you befriend her (be really methodic about it), explain to her that it is your wedding and that you want it your way. Keep her close. Once the REAL madness starts, have her descretly escort everyone who bugs you away from you (lesson thought from my own wedding #1, when the nosy wife of our family priest was standing there staring at me while dressed in sexy bride to be underwear getting my hair done hours before the wedding. I had my auntie remove her from the room).
2. As I got it, this is a mostly do-it-yourself wedding, as was mine. Remember to assign jobs to people for the wedding day, or else you will find yourself doing stuff before you go to marry (lesson thought from own wedding #2: it really was a do-it-yourself wedding. We had rented tables and chairs and everything else was homemade, including the guest favors. I was getting married at 19.00 and at 17.00 I was still setting tables cause I had forgotten to assign that to someone. I must be the fastest dressed bride in the Greek history)
3. Learn the Greek wedding habbits. Be prepared to stand in line to get kissed and hugged by the entire guest list (no matter how ethnic your wedding will be, it will be an insult to Greek people NOT do do this). Remember to take off your wedding ring when you do that, cause people will shake your hand enthusiastically and it will get sore around the wedding ring finger. You dont have to make discussion with the people, just stand there and let them do their thing.
5. Remember, this may be your wedding, but in reality it is THEIR wedding. Everyone else's but yours. No matter how much you want to spend the rest of your life with Mr. Zeus, I cannot imagine of one real reason why anyone would subject themselves to the wedding process (other than wearing a beautiful gown of course!). So in reality you wed to please your family, his family, and provide your extended family and friends a good party opportunity. If its not too much of a hassle, just let them do what they want to do. Remember the movie your blog's title originates from? With a few exaggerations, it will look like that movie, for most parts. Add to that your own family frenzy, I'd love to be in one corner and watch you deal with it hahahah!

Just relax and enjoy. Let the things you cannot avoid just happen.

Yorkshiregurl said...

Awww,try not to stress yourself out too much. I sympathise with you, the paperwork is a pain, I know only too well as I had to go through it all myself. Some of it was so pointless, I just thought they like to make people run around. Fortunately for me I didn't have to deal with it myself, my mother in law took care of it.

As for your wedding look, are you wearing a lengha or sari? Normally asian makeup artists pick out hues from your outfit and use it in the eyeshadow colours etc. I'd stick to mac as their foundation colours are suited to asian skin, so you'll get a good match. It's the only brand I used in Greece. Also, I'm assuming you have an oily skin type since you've mentioned spots.I'm the same and have tried many brands such as eve lom, dr hauschka among others. The former was pricey with little improvement the latter worked however the routine took too long but their products are organic, natural and smell yummy. The product I'm using now is liz earle hot and polish cleanser and its actually a fantastic product, it works for me in that my skin looks so much better it's cleared up loads.If
you can get hold of some I'd advise trying it. It's won quite a few awards and is not very expensive as compared to the brands above. I don't believe expensive makes a product any better. If a product works for you it works.

Sorry for the long comment! Anyway better get back to revision xx

stassa said...

Bolly, don't worry honey. Everything's gonna be fine and you'll be the stunningest of them all :)