Monday, December 17, 2007

Aegean or Asia??

An interesting thing happened to me on this trip to the UK. A potentially life changing thing and to tell you about it I need to go into a bit of background.

I'm an Asia girl at heart. I love Asia. It's where I grew up and no matter what part of Asia I'm in, it all feels smoother, easier, more homely, more familiar. I would love to go live somewhere in Asia, but the Home Country is out of the question because I'm too used to my freedom as a woman.

In 2004, I turned a corner in my life after a period in which I had hit rock bottom and decided to change everything. I treated myself to a birthday in Southern Malaysia, staying with a friend and driving the 30 minutes to Singapore nearly every day. I loved that part of the world; no winters, spicy food, variable scenery, organised and affordable. "This," I thought, "is where I want to live."

Back in the UK I fired off job applications to Singapore. And then the Olympics happened and everything changed. I moved halfway between Asia and Europe and I am happy. But I'm not a risk taker. I don't burn all my bridges, hence negotiating to keep my job just in case things blew up in my face here.

Now I am faced with a very tempting situation. I have been offered a job in the Singapore office of my company. If I was single I would have taken it tomorrow, but I'm not single and I also now have the benefit of hindsight to see how hard it was to move away from my family. I don't know if I could handle doubling the distance.

Mr Zeus is also a Greek Greek, in that Greece is the only place he can see himself living forever. I can't see myself living anywhere forever, but that's my problem. I could not take him somewhere and watch him be miserable.

The ideal situation for me would be to go do this for a year or two, have my adventure in Singapore and then come back and pick up where I left in Athens. What if I go and I hate it? Or Mr Zeus hates it? What would I do for work back in Greece? There isn't a nun in a sex shop's chance of me getting the same arrangement I currently have.

This is the problem with people like me. No where feels like home, no where feels permanent, no where - not even Asia - feels like I could live there forever, and it never will. If I had some sort of affiliation to any place, I could have turned the job down instead of day dreaming about humid weather and laksa. Instead, my risk-averse side has wedged itself between myself and a decision and I am frying necessary braincells trying to figure out how to have my cake and eat it too.

I think my best strategy is to take a deep breath and deal with this in the new year - I have time. Also, I'm not one for horoscopes but the very day this offer was made to me, I decided to read mine and it said that something I desperately want is right infront of me but I should not act too hastily.

But hey, you know what? Sitting at home in these four walls with a fish for company day in day out is pretty confidence killing. Whether I take the job or not, being told that they are not going to start looking for someone until they have my answer makes me feel pretty good. I am walking a little taller, my head a little higher.



Hope said...

Congratulations on the job offer! That's so exciting. But as you say, you don't have to make the decision right away.

How does Mr Zeus feel about going for 2 years? Is that something he would comfortable doing?

Good luck with your decision!

Anonymous said...

Wow! That's great. Congratulations.

My two pence worth...

Take it. It doesn't have to be forever, just a year or two. Nothing is certain and nothing is forever in the job market (or in life for that matter). And if you pass this up, you will always have the what if... in your mind.

Of course, I know you have Mr Zues to think about and I don't know how he feels but two years is really not a long time and what an experience he would have too!

Best of luck with your decision.

Anonymous said...

i lived in singapore for 8 years before coming to greece with my own mr zeus. i followed my mr zeus to singapore and initially hated it and ultimately loved it. had to be dragged away at the airport type of scenario. what i learned is that having a relationship is difficult because you have to compromise. doesn't matter what yr cultural differences are we are talking about two adult people tring to get their jobs etc together. give yr mr Zeus the chance to go with you and at least make a decision, who says he wouldn't like it? you cannot be so sure, greeks thrive away from greece their innate aggressiveness which is nec to survive here makes them scarily successful abroad. think of the roti prata, oh my god and the fried bee hoon or the soups, hawker stalls, of luck Scotzeza ps tax is 12%

itelli said...

Nicely done! Where exactly do u get jobs where they wait for u to make up ur mind? I need to fill in an application ASAP.

Also, I somehow think that Mr Zeus might not be the problem. Maybe his ma' is the one u need to tackle. I mean, how is her son going to live thousands of miles away from her? What will the neighbours say? :)

bollybutton said...

I swear I can't believe my luck sometimes, the company I work for has a real family atmosphere so they always look to hire in-house before they look around.

Mr Zeus is not altogether hostile to the idea, he just doesn't like Asia (though he's never been there). He agreed that we can afford to sit on this one for a while and ponder. But he's a star and said that since he's worked in other countries when he was younger, he can't deny me that opportunity just because it's not on his agenda any more.

Even if I could go out there to train someone for them for 6 months that would be my Asia fix. I just want to see what it would be like to live in Singapore. This might be my last chance since kids will be an issue in the next few years.